Complaining Your Day Away

Do you ever find yourself in conversation when someone starts complaining about something and then everyone jumps in?  I think this is a common occurrence for pretty much everyone.  I know it happens to me at some point almost daily.  Here is the big question for you: How do you respond when everyone starts complaining?  Do you jump in with gusto?  Do you listen politely?  Do you redirect the conversation to something more positive?  Do you take your leave and exit the conversation?

I’m sure the answer is often times situational.  Perhaps sometimes we need a good venting session.  Maybe sometimes we aren’t in the mood and we exit the conversation to talk to someone else or go find something else to do.  Other times we may listen politely while we wait for the tide of the conversation to drift in a different direction.

How does complaining affect you?

How do you feel after a complaint filled discussion?  Do you feel better?  Sometimes you might, since you’ll find that you aren’t the only one with problems.  We should already know this, but it is nice to have a reminder from time to time.  More often though, you likely feel a little irritable, a bit down, and possibly completely yucky.

The negativity in complaining tends to flow out and affect you and others around you.  If you start that negative conversation, you are bringing everyone else down.  If you perpetuate that conversation, you are bringing everyone else down.  If you listen politely, you might be brining yourself down.

According to the law of attraction, since the things you are complaining about remain in your thoughts, you will attract more of those things filling your complaints.  If you are complaining about the neighbors loud music, you may find it happing more often.  If you complain about not having enough money, you might find yourself with less.  If you complain about the world dealing you a bad hand, you could find yourself in more bad situations.

According to A Complaint Free World the average person complains about 15-30 times each day.  That is a lot of negativity being brought into your daily life.  They also mention that studies have shown that complaining about one’s health actually tends to make a person’s health worse, which lends some credence to the law of attraction effect.

How can we complain less?

The best thing you can do is to simply start paying attention to your conversations.  Be present while you are speaking and take responsibility for your words.  Some choose to use a bracelet or trinket, as popularized by A Complaint Free World, to remain cognizant of their complaints.   The key is to simply be aware of your complaining and make an effort to change.

That means making an effort to avoid starting complaint filled conversations.  It also means not participating in those conversations.  If you find yourself in a conversation like that, you should either exit the conversation or redirect it to something positive.  I think the redirection is best.

Have you complained today?  Do you think you complain too much?  What steps do you recommend to cut back on complaining?  Please share your thoughts in the comment section below.

Comments

  1. says

    When I started reading your post, I immediately thought of A Complaint Free World. I have undertaken the complaint free challenge several times. And while I don’t always redirect my thoughts before the words leave my mouth, I almost always catch myself mid sentence and try to follow a complaint with a shift to a positive outlook. Sometime we think, what can one person do to make a difference. Well, this is one thing! A single person shifting away from complaining can change the environment for a whole group, whether that is at home or at work. Great post!
    Galen Pearl´s last blog post ..Spiritual Simplicity

  2. says

    Enjoyed the article and gave some thought to the subject…I have been in the situation of being a
    ” sounding board ” for people on occassion. It makes me reflect on my life and just how lucky I am.
    I actually feel better after they finished, knowing that they got rid of their anguish, I do not however let it permeate my “chi”. Ying and Yang are part of our world and one could not exist without the other, so I try to stay empathetic and apathetic to all, as one day I may have a need and hope there will be someone to listen. I do realize though that there are some who thrive on complaining and never have anything positive to say..to them I say ” not too many clouds today…love your shoes ! “..works everytime…
    kjforce´s last blog post ..Just one of those days ?

    • says

      Hi KJ,
      I rarely get the feeling others got rid of any anguish by using me as a sounding board. It may happen sometimes, and in those cases where someone really needs to talk something out, I try to be open to lending an ear. Sometimes I wish I had more patience with people. Typically the complaints are rather petty, and I’d do better to redirect the conversation into something more positive. Nice work changing to topic on the chronic complainers, I like the “not too many clouds today… love your shoes.”

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